The holidays are coming faster than an Amazon package to our door, and with that said it’s important to remind ourselves what the holidays are really about- connection. To ourselves and the ones we love most, especially our significant other. Bonding activities with your partner, or spouse (as well as family and friends) can help create connection and have a huge impact on your mental and physical health, giving you all the warm and fuzzy feelings of the season.
“My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others.”-Bob Hope
Here is my list of Naughty and Nice ideas to create connection, fun and joy with the one you love most.
Don’t Get Your Tinsel in a Tangle
This time of year, the schedule can be filled with holiday parties and errands, leaving little time for much else. This year, break up the whirlwind and mark your calendar for a romanic holiday date night!
- Calling all music aficionados: Want something more intimate and original? You must check out Dante’s Hifi in Wynwood. This is an intimate listening room inspired by the Japanese. There are nostalgic vinyls lined up across the walls, and there are guest DJ’s who play everything from jazz to blues to hip-hop. This place is great if you want something intimate and low-key.
Wine lovers should check out Happy Wine Calle 8. It’s a unique, relaxed spot to share some deep conversation and a nice holiday red.
- It wouldn’t be the holidays without rocking around the Christmas tree. Ball and Chain is re-opening soon, and if your love language is dancing salsa, bachata and listening to live music, then this is the spot that will surely get you and your partner wrapped up!
- Not a dancer? How about getting into the holiday spirit with a lover’s stroll at the Night Garden Light Spectacular. Take this time to slow down together and appreciate the child-like wonder of the holiday lights- sure to light up the romance in your relationship!
No time for a date night? Evenings all booked up? Day dates can be romantic too!
- Head down to Coconut Grove’s Farmers Market. I truly love this place. There is a serene energy here, and you and your partner can walk through the melting pot of spices, flavors, and vendors at your own pace while getting some fresh air and enjoying the beautiful South Florida “winter” weather. Getting some Vitamin D will help boost those endorphins too.
- If you and your partner find yourselves doing last minute holiday shopping at the mall, turn this errand into a date and stop by The Floral Escape at Aventura Mall. Slowly meander through this beautiful floral walk through, perhaps while holding hands.Stay present and savor the moment with your partner: even a 20-minute experience like this can be extremely bonding.
Naughty or Nice?
On your date night (or day date), remember to stay present. Put any stresses or conflicts on Santa’s workshop shelf. These moments are about being playful and relieving stress, and should give you something special to look forward to with your partner.
Hold hands, make eye contact when talking, turn phones off, express gratitude and appreciation for one other. And let things get physical. Sex is a healthy component of any relationship. Chemicals like oxytocin, adrenaline and Serotonin are released, and these are important for couples. If you are feeling more naughty than nice, there are some adult themed ideas that may lead to more mistletoe kisses.
- Pull out your lipstick, put on your favorite heels and venture out to Hotel Faena and see Tryst Cabaret, “A Lovers’ Rendezvous”. This adult event will inspire you to get physical and playful using all your senses, from touch to taste, from sight to sound, and smell.
If you and your partner don’t feel like leaving Santa’s Workshop, here’s a stay-at-home idea I love- and it lasts all season!
- Advent Calendars aren’t just for chocolates and treats. Think of an Advent Calendar as a way to prepare your hearts and home- and your relationship- for the spirit of the holidays. You don’t have to be religious to do this, and it’s a beautiful way to build connection!
Print 2 December calendars (one for you and one for your partner) and get post-its for each day in December. On each day, write something naughty or nice for your partner and cover it with post-its. Have your partner do the same.
Discuss with your partner what your calendars should focus on. Do you want the calendars to inspire more intimacy? Do you want the calendars to inspire more communication? Whatever you want for your relationship, use this Advent Calendar as a fun way to inspire these things.
Your calendars could include doing house chores for a whole day, cooking a romantic dinner one night, simply articulating what you are most grateful for in your partner, describing a special memory you both share. Don’t forget to sprinkle in some naughty surprises you both can look forward to- maybe giving clues for a fun role play, risque attire, or a new toy from Santa’s sexy workshop!
Each day you and your partner peel off the post-it and focus on that item for the day. So don’t forget to make it fun, make it intentional, and give yourselves something to look forward to each day during the holiday madness.
Santa’s Relationship Workshop
This year, embrace some activities that can help to build a deeper bond between you and your partner.
- Create something together that reflects your relationship. Wreaths, ornaments, a stocking, or a vision board can become an ongoing tradition in your relationship each year. Whatever it is, creating a physical representation of the strengths in your relationship, or a theme of how you were able to support each other this year, or a major accomplishment you may have shared, can be an incredible bonding experience. And you can remember that every time you look at the creation you made together.
- Discovery Decks are another fun activity for couples. You can buy them or you can make them! Prompts can range from “What is a place that you would like to travel to?” to “What do you like best about our relationship?” to “Over the last five years how have you changed most?” I highly recommend Best Self for an array of Discovery Decks- I love called “Courage Over Comfort”. They also have journals, digital download worksheets, and online courses that cover all aspects of self-improvement.
- Volunteering during the holidays is a great way to fill up your relationship tank. It also can put a lot of our stress and conflict into perspective, and experiencing that together can create a deeper bond. If you do decide to volunteer, notice how your body and mind feel after you have done the activity. Do you feel more present? Present with yourself, with your partner? Just observe these small things. Sometimes, when we step outside of ourselves it can help us shift in the best ways possible. Check out Volunteermatch.org to choose a virtual or in-person volunteer opportunity near you.
I hope you feel inspired to spark deeper connections this holiday season! No matter what you choose, be sure to prioritize the relationships that are most important to you. And do so authentically. This is a recipe for all the joy of the holiday season!